inflatable trampoline for children image
lobquin
My son just turned 3, he has a friend a couple months younger than him. whenever we see this little boy all they do is fight with each other. They hit, tackle, push, kick, and jump on each other, and it's not just fun. This child's grandmother teaches him to fight. I do not like the effect it has on my son, but its not my place to discipline that child. The little boy has a 4.5 year old sister that my son gets along great with, they don't fight at all.
I have to point out my son doesn't act like this around other children either, he'll meet new kids and he may be a bit eccentric but he doesn't just run up to them and start hitting. I visit quite frequently with this little boy, and I don't want to deal with them fighting every time I go over. How can I get my son to stop fighting with this one boy? why does he do this?
Answer
From reading the other responses, I have to say that I don't think the issue is that your child is scared of this other boy, it's just that when they get together BOTH kids play too rough for your taste. Your options are these:
1) Stop seeing that other little TWO year old boy "quite frequently" until he's worked past this phase or until your little guy has enough self control not to engage in behavior that you find unacceptable.
2) Talk with your own son in advance about what behaviors you expect during your visit and bring along things both kids can play with (inflatable trampoline, tricycles, balls, bubbles, painting the fence with water, etc.) that will allow them to work out their energy together and then micromanage their play so that you are constantly establishing boundaries and rules and modeling problem solving strategies so that the violence level is acceptable to you.
3) Relax a bit. My son is a sweet quiet boy who loves building toys and is generally cautious and quiet except when he's around one particular friend. The other boy's mother is a bit older and she is relaxed about their "play." She's a good friend and I finally had to take a step back and realized that ttwo boys wrestling around on the grass together was not going to cause permanent damage and we are there to step in if it looks like someone is going to get hurt (eg. they pick up a toy that could be a projectile or are wrestling near a table or edge of the playground where someone could fall and hurt themselves) When they were two and three, we often joked that we just got together to let the kids burn energy beating on each other. However, at four and five, they each have other interests and play games together - the "we only know how to interact in a way that is physical" phase has passed.
You don't say what your relationship is, but I'm assuming that #1 isn't an option, so I'd suggest getting together in a more structured setting (eg. a "Mommy and Me" type class) or leaving your son with a babysitter/his father while you have adult time. It sounds like #2 is what you're doing now "not fun" - but if you're in a babysitter type role than that with some advance planning on your part, you can make the playdates work. #3 is what I went with, but that doesn't mean it's right for you. If you are really worried about your child's safety or if your child suddenly starts behaving violently towards others then I'd say go back to #1.
From reading the other responses, I have to say that I don't think the issue is that your child is scared of this other boy, it's just that when they get together BOTH kids play too rough for your taste. Your options are these:
1) Stop seeing that other little TWO year old boy "quite frequently" until he's worked past this phase or until your little guy has enough self control not to engage in behavior that you find unacceptable.
2) Talk with your own son in advance about what behaviors you expect during your visit and bring along things both kids can play with (inflatable trampoline, tricycles, balls, bubbles, painting the fence with water, etc.) that will allow them to work out their energy together and then micromanage their play so that you are constantly establishing boundaries and rules and modeling problem solving strategies so that the violence level is acceptable to you.
3) Relax a bit. My son is a sweet quiet boy who loves building toys and is generally cautious and quiet except when he's around one particular friend. The other boy's mother is a bit older and she is relaxed about their "play." She's a good friend and I finally had to take a step back and realized that ttwo boys wrestling around on the grass together was not going to cause permanent damage and we are there to step in if it looks like someone is going to get hurt (eg. they pick up a toy that could be a projectile or are wrestling near a table or edge of the playground where someone could fall and hurt themselves) When they were two and three, we often joked that we just got together to let the kids burn energy beating on each other. However, at four and five, they each have other interests and play games together - the "we only know how to interact in a way that is physical" phase has passed.
You don't say what your relationship is, but I'm assuming that #1 isn't an option, so I'd suggest getting together in a more structured setting (eg. a "Mommy and Me" type class) or leaving your son with a babysitter/his father while you have adult time. It sounds like #2 is what you're doing now "not fun" - but if you're in a babysitter type role than that with some advance planning on your part, you can make the playdates work. #3 is what I went with, but that doesn't mean it's right for you. If you are really worried about your child's safety or if your child suddenly starts behaving violently towards others then I'd say go back to #1.
what are some fun things to do with a 2 year old during the summer?
just_a_gir
i am pregnant with our second child now and my son will be turning 2 years old next week. my husband and i want to do some fun things with him this summer since we probably wont be able to do much next summer. we have discussed taking him to disney world but i am afraid he is not old enough to enjoy it. do you think he is too young or do you think it would be fun for him?
thanks you for all the great ideas! i never really thought about taking him camping. we live in tennessee and we about 20 mins away from a lot of really great campsites plus lots of lakes. we may wait on the disney world thing til he is older.
Answer
I think Disney World would be great! There are plenty of little rides for him, but I think he would enjoy it more and remember it better when he gets older.
I think it would be cheaper (and mean a lot more to him) if you spent your vacation money on stuff to do at home. Get him a nice pool. Inflatable or not, I've seen some nice ones at the dollar store for $25 and are big enough for four people or so. That's big enough for the three of you to get in and splash around. I think he'd have even more fun if you let him go through the store and pick out water toys to play with too. When he's young, all he wants to do is spend time with his parents and feel loved.
Aside from water (which was ALWAYS my favorite), try chalk. Inexpensive and fun. Get him a little bike with training wheels and let him play with that. Rent movies and stay up late in the summer watching them with some popcorn or snacks. Go camping! Oh how I LOVED camping!! You can go just about anywhere nowadays and find a place to hike, sit in a canoe or paddle boat, fish, and have a fire. I know I always loved watching a fire, making smores, and throwing in small sticks and feeling like I was a big help. Also, try building something. Maybe this summer your husband can have some bonding time with your son and build a club house? That'd be a great place for him to play as well as a wonderful place for the new baby to play in when she gets older too!
Try asking your son what he wants to do during the week and plan for it on the weekend if he wants to go out someplace. I don't know if your son likes babysitters, but my boyfriend's niece and nephew LOVED playing in the McDonalds play place with us. They did for hoouurrrsss. In the end, we were more tired! I also babysit girls who just have a ball when I'm over and are constantly asking for me. You might look in your church or someplace and find a good, social babysitter to play with your kids.
Sprinklers, water balloons, fire fly catching, camping, butterfly catching, fishing, frog catching, drawing with chalk, etc.
Dollar Stores are my favorite for anything. One thing I love getting is Silly String. You can pick up a can for about $2 each. Get half a dozen in your favorite colors and go outside and shoot each other. Run behind trees and have fun. Also try adding water balloons to the play fun.
If you're really into the idea of a vacation more than several camping trips because you don't like the mosquitoes or the idea of not taking a shower everyday gets to you, try some place more like a beach or lake. I went to a wonderful resort in Tennessee that had a beach. There was a small lake and nice sand as well as a nice pool. Though he'd need some assistance in the water, I think that would be great!
Try to spend everyday with him doing something fun. Cook with him, make arts and crafts (supplies at a dollar store like popsicle sticks, play dough, paints, etc!), and make every little day something special. Buy a CD Player and play his favorite songs while you clean or are having fun. Buy a mini trampoline he can jump on and make "obstacle courses" out of pillows and blankets over chairs that you guys have to run through.
I know my parents are big on vacations, but they were never really all that much fun for me because someone was always fighting with someone else. It's nice since it's just the three of you, so it might work! But I know I always got along best (and had the most fun and made the best memories) when we were just doing something at home together. (:
I think Disney World would be great! There are plenty of little rides for him, but I think he would enjoy it more and remember it better when he gets older.
I think it would be cheaper (and mean a lot more to him) if you spent your vacation money on stuff to do at home. Get him a nice pool. Inflatable or not, I've seen some nice ones at the dollar store for $25 and are big enough for four people or so. That's big enough for the three of you to get in and splash around. I think he'd have even more fun if you let him go through the store and pick out water toys to play with too. When he's young, all he wants to do is spend time with his parents and feel loved.
Aside from water (which was ALWAYS my favorite), try chalk. Inexpensive and fun. Get him a little bike with training wheels and let him play with that. Rent movies and stay up late in the summer watching them with some popcorn or snacks. Go camping! Oh how I LOVED camping!! You can go just about anywhere nowadays and find a place to hike, sit in a canoe or paddle boat, fish, and have a fire. I know I always loved watching a fire, making smores, and throwing in small sticks and feeling like I was a big help. Also, try building something. Maybe this summer your husband can have some bonding time with your son and build a club house? That'd be a great place for him to play as well as a wonderful place for the new baby to play in when she gets older too!
Try asking your son what he wants to do during the week and plan for it on the weekend if he wants to go out someplace. I don't know if your son likes babysitters, but my boyfriend's niece and nephew LOVED playing in the McDonalds play place with us. They did for hoouurrrsss. In the end, we were more tired! I also babysit girls who just have a ball when I'm over and are constantly asking for me. You might look in your church or someplace and find a good, social babysitter to play with your kids.
Sprinklers, water balloons, fire fly catching, camping, butterfly catching, fishing, frog catching, drawing with chalk, etc.
Dollar Stores are my favorite for anything. One thing I love getting is Silly String. You can pick up a can for about $2 each. Get half a dozen in your favorite colors and go outside and shoot each other. Run behind trees and have fun. Also try adding water balloons to the play fun.
If you're really into the idea of a vacation more than several camping trips because you don't like the mosquitoes or the idea of not taking a shower everyday gets to you, try some place more like a beach or lake. I went to a wonderful resort in Tennessee that had a beach. There was a small lake and nice sand as well as a nice pool. Though he'd need some assistance in the water, I think that would be great!
Try to spend everyday with him doing something fun. Cook with him, make arts and crafts (supplies at a dollar store like popsicle sticks, play dough, paints, etc!), and make every little day something special. Buy a CD Player and play his favorite songs while you clean or are having fun. Buy a mini trampoline he can jump on and make "obstacle courses" out of pillows and blankets over chairs that you guys have to run through.
I know my parents are big on vacations, but they were never really all that much fun for me because someone was always fighting with someone else. It's nice since it's just the three of you, so it might work! But I know I always got along best (and had the most fun and made the best memories) when we were just doing something at home together. (:
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